Learn to recognize those people who aren’t needed in your life
Stay away from those who make your life mission more difficult
Have you felt the need to turn away from a person you know is toxic to your life? Have you stayed to wait for that person to change without making any effort? It’s wonderful to help people overcome their traumas and help each other every day, but that doesn’t mean we should stay in their lives forever even if we know they’re not doing us any good.
Limits with people who do us no good should be a factor to consider in order to keep us safe from the influence that the destructive behaviors of those people who in the long term sing to us in our processes of constant growth.
Let me tell you that throughout my life experience I have had the opportunity to come across people who are not the best choice for those who see their lives as a goal of self-improvement, and it is from there that I have learned to identify the behaviors of those people that if we allow them in our lives, either from the way we behave or from whom we constantly surround ourselves, can be a huge stone in our shoes; that’s why I want to tell you some characteristics of these people so that you identify them and know that you’re going to get them:
They have no clear objectives
I think the clearest characteristic of these people is disrespect for their lives and for that of others. We always see them gossiping with the neighbor, talking badly about others and at the same time wishing for the lives of others. These people have no clear goals about their lives and therefore it is easy for them to be watching TV all day, on social media or on the street doing nothing; at the same time they seek to make their friends behave in the same way, and if you don’t do what they say, they get mad at you because “you’re demeasured,” “you’re not a happy person as they are” or the most common, “you’re not humble” for not doing what 99% of people do. The difficult thing about this feature for those who decide to live with them is that over time they can choose to behave in the same way and as a result, when they reach a very adult age they realize that they have done absolutely nothing for their professional lives.
They make you feel like they’re your friends, but they disappear when you need them
They are fascinated by having many friends as the wider the options of friends, the less are the chances of spending an afternoon with themselves. As I mentioned earlier, these people love hang out most of the time and that’s exactly what makes them seem so friendly. When you’re with them everything seems perfect, the laughter goes on, it’s easier to drink big glasses of liquor and you even get to the point of breaking your personal promises so as not to disappoint that “happy” and “fun” friend. However, when you’re sad and in need of someone who listens to you, it’s right there when they disappear and not only that, but after they’ve left you alone then they come back with a huge smile, without any apology and with many “fun” plans that make you fall into temptation.
Remember that it’s better to rebuild yourself solidly in solitude than to artificially rebuild yourself surrounded by people who don’t value your life mission.
And yes, you’re going to promise a thousand times to stop talking to them, but you’re also going to fall a thousand times into the trap of their false promises and sometimes in your need to be accompanied, yet remember that it’s better to rebuild yourself solidly in solitude than to artificially rebuild yourself surrounded by people who don’t value your life mission. You should keep in mind that once you break the first promise with yourself just to satisfy that fake friend and the influence they have on you, you’re going to do it over and over again until you learn in the worst way to recognize and turn away from that person you call friends, but who doesn’t recognize you as a friend , and it’s not because he doesn’t want to, but he has so many fictional relationships that he finds it difficult to have real relationships.
Excessive use of drugs and/or alcohol
Lack of introspection and excessive daily entertainment causes many of these people to fall into addictions to unrecognizable mental and physical states. Rarely will they accept their situation, they will tell you that everything is, even when the use of drugs or alcohol is every day higher. It is our duty to accept that and if we can, help by recommending going with a health care professional. It’s also important to put limits on our attempt at help, because sometimes too much help can make the situation worse and move problems into your person’s life.
I want to tell you that for years I had a person with these characteristics as a friend. I tried a thousand ways to help him, to counsel him, and even to break my own promises in order to make him fall to his senses about how he was wasting his life. However, the results were always the same, I ended up joining him and his lifestyle that brought me absolutely nothing but on the contrary, it made my goals more difficult because I had no discipline and commitment for what he deserved and should achieve and all for trying to make someone happy who was not clear that it was his happiness.
Teachers of Pain
They are great teachers of pain, in the end they leave great teachings, however, I will always recommend learning from love and humility, therefore, if they can turn away from those people, do so as soon as possible and so they will have more space for people who will surely be of more benefit to their lives.
NOTE: It took me years to learn the lesson of letting go of that beloved friend, who today looks happy with a variety of friends, showing himself happy on social media and behind him the effort of his beloved parents and sister waiting for him to go to college or at least make the decision to think about what he is doing with his life , since he will soon be 30 years old and by then there will be little his parents will be able to do for him.
Ever since I stopped seeing him as a friend, my life has changed for the better. I met great people, my discipline in my projects increased and today I value more those who dedicate their time and love to me from an act of conscience and not from necessity.
